LWT (T5): Dating, Fear, the Ego & The Teachings of Eckhart Tolle
In this episode: You want connect with someone you are attracted to. You want to take the first step, but are overcome with fear. All this fear stems from the ego. Becoming aware of the ego is the first step towards overcoming your fears.
Play Now: Take 5 : Dating, Fear, and the Ego
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Living With Tolle “Take 5″ is a new series of podcasts full of practical tips to guide you through the challenges of daily life. In this series of short programs, we look at specific, real life situations that challenge our ability to stay present.
Life Coach Greg Larsen and Leo Aristimuno guide us towards a state of awareness and presence through the fundamental teachings of Eckhart Tolle. We also continue to produce our longer, more in-depth podcasts once a month.
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Comment by Jordi on 20 March 2009:
I just want to inform you: this things of “dating” are a big thing in the USA, here in Europe (at least in latin countries: France, Spain, Italy…) it’s much more natural. Normally, you don’t ask a girl for a date as we can see on movies…. you meet her when you are with your friends.. so somehow you are already “dating her” or maybe the same class… or work… but I think that there you date a girl with “intentions”, meaning that both of you know that something can happen (as long as I know by movies, books and 2 american friends), and you dress yourself better… bring her something… very unnatural.
Here you can ask her to have a coffe, or to gou out to dinner, but you go in the quality of a friend.. maybe another day as a friend again, and if the feeling comes, it comes naturally… but you never *expect* the feeling.
Sorry if I didn’t explain myself properly (english is not my language), but the idea is that I think that unnaturality that I see is what makes people feel shy. Here I wouldn’t feel shy because I am not “going for it”… if I would do it in the way you do it there (the date thing) I would feel weid (or shy).
Greetings and good job! Please put podcasts more often, if possible.
Comment by Greg on 28 March 2009:
Hi Jordi!
Thanks for your comment and the insights on the dating scene in European Latin countries.
Dating is such a complex situation for the ego, because on one hand it wants the date and what that person can add to it’s identity. On the other hand, the ego fears rejection as it might take away from its inflated sense of identity.
Whether it’s dating, or with your boss, or with someone famous, the ego is always trapped in this pull of wanting the other to fulfill it, but at the same time fearful of the rejection. And then we are forced to experience this silliness, which can be anxious and stressful.
Thanks for your encouraging words and we will work on getting more podcasts out.
Greg